Friday, October 19, 2012

Hakuna Matata

Hakuna Matata..it means no worries.

Attitudes are contagious, is yours worth catching? I wish that I could have 100% positive outlook every single day of my life. However, I am human and I do not work that way. I have my good and bad days just like everyone else. Thinking posistive can not only bring up your personal morale, but the morale of others around you as well. A friend of mine has sparked the saying Hakuna Matata in me recently. Who could forget that phrase? My generation heard that phrase over and over again while watching Disney's, The Lion King. Wouldn't life be incredible? Timon, Pumba, and Simba singing about no worries for the rest of their days while frollickling around the beautiful lands they live in. Imagine if we could apply something as simple as Hakuna Matata in our everyday lives. Think about it, no worries, simply the positives. In our society, we have many things to quote on quote worry about. Adolescents especially worry way too much about things of little importance. For instance, how many girls do you hear talking about their belly or leg fat, face breaks outs, boys, clothing, and their own status quot? You hear boys express concern about body image as well: six pack abs, defined arms and back, white teeth, and facial hair to prove their manliness. Other issues are strong among adolescents in academic and competitive streaks too. Competition of scholarships for athletics, service, and academics are huge. In our society you must go to college to be successful. College is neither cheap or easy; rather expensive and challenging. I am the first to admit being guilty to falling into societal expectations. Striving to be a positive light, to be different; is socially unacceptable. I want to be different, but I also want to be accepted. This is a conflict, I must choose what I would like to be. "Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind," Dr. Sues. That being said, I shouldn't care about what others have to say or think of me because the ones who matter will encourage me to excel in everything I choose to do. Imagine if adolescents broke out of the status quot and chose to simply be the unique selves they were created to be. Wouldn't it be incredible if humans understood that they are completely different from anyone else? That I am unlike anyone else in the entire universe. I may have similar titles and similar interests as others, but me as a whole is unlike anything anyone has every seen before. I am me. I am more than just an athlete, student, daughter, lifeguard, sister, friend, or writer. I am Hillary. I am more than just a short brown hair, green-eyed girl. I am Hillary. I am more than a college student who has big dreams. I am Hillary. The greatest thing about me is that I am different. Hakuna Matata. I choose not to worry about my appearance any longer. I choose to be a good friend. I choose to live above the influence. I choose to be different. Now, I am still human and I will have my bad days; however, I will strive to no longer worry. I choose Hakuna Matata. I choose to embrace myself in every aspect of my being.

What will you choose?

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Tattoos

I have recently been asked many questions about my tattoos and what they mean to me. Currently, I have two of them, one on my right foot and one on my left shoulder. The one on my foot was drawn by a beautiful girl named Polly. We were at a church camp and I had told her my testimony. Polly is an incredible artist. Later that day she had been giving our girls tattoos in sharpie. She asked if I wanted one and what I wanted. I told her whatever she thought fit me. She drew the word beautiful on my foot. That word applies a lot to my life. I do not think that I am the most beautiful thing ever made believe me. I have had a struggle with my appearance and self esteem since I was little. It is an everyday reminder that I am beautiful. It goes further than that, I am reminded that no matter what life brings me I am blessed. Life is beautiful. My second tattoo is on my shoulder and it says faith is within me. I saw something like this online and loved it. I drew out my own design of it and had it done. My faith has pulled me out of the muck and comforted my brokenness when I've hit rock bottom. I say faith is within me because it comes from my soul. The dandelion represents the beauty of life. Dandelions are commonly passed over as ugly and weeds; it reminded me as to how I view life sometimes. When life looks dim and ugly remember that although a storm might be hovering; life is still beautiful. There are four birds going from little to big. These represent my four siblings. I have two older brothers and two younger sisters. The only thing that connects me and my siblings is our faith. It is within me just as it is within them.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

New Day

It's been quite some time since I've been able to get on and write. School has started back up and is already kicking my butt. There is so much negativity around. I was recently asked what sense I would lose if I had to and why. I chose my hearing. I love to listen to people and hear the incredible sounds of nature around me, however; I would love to block all of the negative comments and snide remarks said to and around me every single day. Could you imagine how inspiring it would be to learn and communicate in new ways? Challenging of course, but also inspiring. I can only imagine how much happier I would be as well. Imagine. You hear nothing negative at all. Loss of hearing would be an incredibly hard challenge, but I think it would be worth it if I absolutely had to choose something. Living in a world with no negative sound...that my friends is inspirational.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Write about someone who inspires you

Someone who inspires me.

My papa inspires me. He is one of the most generous and hard working people I have ever come to encounter. He is one of those people, that no matter who you are; if you need help, he will help you. My papa raised to be a strong and respectful lady. It breaks his heart that so many men these days don't have respect for themselves let alone women. I have never met someone so passionate about Jesus and his family. I have the utmost respect for him and he is one of my heroes. Shoutout to you papa, I love you and am so thankful you are in my life!

Monday, April 23, 2012

Broken

A car pulls up and a man gets out.
She doesn't want to leave..

Her mom squeezes her tight,
then lets her go.

She gets in the car and watches her mother's image fade into the distance.

He drops her off,
"Who are these people? These strangers?"
He doesn't love her, he doesn't want her.









Hours go by and he's no where to be found.
"Where is he? Why doesn't he love me?" she wonders.

Hungry she looks, but just like him they won't let her eat.
"Maybe I really am fat...maybe I shouldn't eat."

She aches, but she can't cry.
Crying is against the rules.

As the oldest she must stay strong.
She's not alone, she's not the only one hurting, longing to be loved.

She must take care of the others, they have no one else.

He finally comes.
She trys to tell him,
she trys to say that her heart is breaking,
he laughs.

He is controlling,
you don't complain, you don't disobey, you don't talk back.

The lies and the pain confuse her.
"Why doesn't he love me?"
She has no one when she is with him.

The damage he has done to her will never fade away,
although you can't see them the scars remain.

Only God is there,
she tries to have faith.

She prays alone and silent,
she musn't be caught.

She wants to give up, let him win, and take her own life.

She wonders if she has a purpose..
She cries out to God...
God whispers "you are my child, you are have a purpose bigger than this."

Nothing is ever wrong on the outside,
she hides behind her smile.

Although you can't see them,
the bruises, the cuts, and scars state the memories.

She hides it all inside,
and covers the pain.

She prays to God,
please give me one last day.

God grants her wish,
and gives her many days.

Although she is broken,
those bruises, cuts, and scars are more than just memories.
They are battle scars, reminders of what she has overcome.

While alone she is broken,
with Jesus she is strong.
He has taught her to take her weaknesses
and turn them into strengths,
to take her fears and conquer them,
to take her dreams,
and turn them into reality.

Just because you are broken,
doesn't mean you are done.
If you are broken,
it is opportunity to be healed.

She doesn't hide behind her smile anymore,
because now when she smiles, she smiles for real.
She smiles because she has something to live for.


I have been set free

The blood has been paid
and the chains have been broken,
I am finally free of
the power held over me.

In those final days that darkness reigned,
I prayed for someone to rescue me,
Jesus answered my prayer,
and took my place for me.

With scarred hands and a hole in His side,
He reached out His hand and said "You are free."

I took His hand only to feel His gentle embrace,
I fell to my knees, thankful for grace.
As I wept in His arms, He comforted me.

He spoke with compassion as He exclaimed, "My child, you are free."
Undeserved of His love and mercy, I am.
His one request was to make disciples of Him.

I tell you a story of love.
Of one who took my place,
so that I could live.

My battle was fought,
my Jesus paid the price for me.

Darkness has no hold over me,
for the blood of the Lamb set me free.




Where I'm From

Day 2, part 2: Write a poem about where you are from.

I'm from the sweet smell
of the strong, roaring ocean,
From squishing my toes into the sand
and riding those waves to shore,








From hot mashed potatoes and gravy,
bacon sizzling in the season pan,
pumpkin pie served in a nice cool breeze,

From "Because I said so that's why,"
to "Beggars can't be choosers"

From the old oak tree house,
where many battles were fought,
A box of books filled with faded faces,
and reminisced memories,

From that old rope swing,
where I'd fly like wonder woman through the wind,















That old dog ran as fast as a lightening bolt
when our door bell would ring,














From the know-it-alls to the hand-me-downs,
Saturday garage sales and seven eleven slurpees,

Riding on a briefcase in my grandpa's old red chevy,
I was on top of the world.

I'm from the sweet smell of the strong, roaring ocean,
watching the sun set over the water that never ends.